I've made my choice to do a fan-fiction of the Korean Drama/Comedy He's Beautiful (You're Beautiful) :) Hope you enjoy.
And again, this is all just for fun . :)
This blogskin is proudly presented to you by Anna May
with the graphic from Obsequious.
Episode 2 - Part 4
Monday, October 25, 2010 @ 4:10 AM
[Min Hyuk's POV]
Weird. Why am I here sitting inside my car waiting for nothing? Or staring at nothing?
Weird, isn't it? I secretly followed Sung Hyo just to make sure she gets home safely, or even know where she lives. She was harassed, but even before I can go out of this car, someone came to the rescue. Who is that superman?
Is this real? This is really, really bizarre. How odd is it to see the last person you're expecting to see? I'd rather see a stranger than to Jong Hyun acting so strange.
Am I really seeing Jong Hyun with his arms around Sung Hyo for comfort? How can--he has autophobia, right? How can he drive alone this far? You know... by himself? There's really something about Sung Hyo that makes Jong Hyun act oddly. But something that makes him better than who he really is, that's something that makes me feel awful at the same time. But isn't it funnier that I followed Sung Hyo? Even helped her wash her hands... I, myself, am acting weird as well.
Then I saw Jong Hyun helping Sung Hyo get into his car. Anyway, that's a relief knowing Sung Hyo's safe now with him to take her home.
I hope they won't see me so I just slowly backed out from the scene with my headlights off. I can't catch any attention right now.
They might think I'm really weird.
Weird, weirdest word so far tonight. *sigh*
[Sung Hyo's POV]
In an awkward silence, I had to break it.
I sniffed. "Kamsahamnida." I said in a low voice, still in shock from what happened.
"You don't need to thank me, you need to point to me where you live." He smiled a bit.
Where do I freaking live? And why do I freaking live with a mega famous band secretly? Now I remember... I have a bigger problem now with Jong Hyun than walking alone in the dark. What should I tell him? Think fast, Sung Hyo. "Still quite far.." Nice one, Sung Hyo. At least you're not lying!
"okay, just tell me if we're already getting there."
"Okay. Can I ask you something?"
"Sure, what is it?"
"Being famous, you know... that CN BLUE boy band composed of three members... does anybody know where you live? Or is that a secret?"
He did not answer right away. Five seconds. "Of course, our manager knows where we live." He grinned, as if it's a good joke.
"No, I meant... strangers, like me." I pointed myself.
"Supposedly, no one should know about our place. But technically, you do."
"So... Am I the only 'stranger' who knows where you guys live?"
"You got it right." He nodded.
"Oh... I promise I won't tell anyone." I tried to smile, but it's a cracked up one.
"Why did you ask?"
"Nothing, just asking. So... maybe I should know if I can tell anyone I went to the CN BLUE's house." I just joked, we kind of laughed. But it didn't last a minute, I pointed him to the left.
So, nobody knows where they live? Probably, nobody knows where ANJELL lives too. That means, Jong Hyun won't know I live with ANJELL. I'm just going to say that's a friend's house. Yes! That is!
[Shin Woo's POV]
Mi Nam did not go out of her room for almost the whole day now. He hasn't eaten anything. But I cannot force her to do something she doesn't want. Plus, maybe he's just in need of time.
I just turned on the t.v. and put in the CN Blue mini concerts DVD. I just want to watch them, how they've gone through it all without me. Seriously, I miss them. It's just that I don't know if they can take it to see me ever again.
My little brother back then is now grown up. He's changed so much, and now it feels like he's not my brother anymore. But there's still something deep within our hearts that tells me, we are brothers. Though his words were serious enough to tell me to stop caring about him, I just can't. We are blood-tied. And no one can deny that fact.
When I was in CN Blue, I mostly composed our songs. Though Jong Hyun sometimes tried to compose one, we'll end up editing them mostly like actually the whole song. He's never into writing, but he's so much into playing guitar. We're not that the same, we're two different people of the same passion, we differ in our perspectives in life.
He's too young back then, he never really cared about anyone around him. Yes, he cares for our band, but not enough to lead the band to success. He always relied on me, I always put my trust in him. But he never really used that trust I gave him wisely. I left him not without a reason. I left him for his own sake. He's just too blind to see that.
Those times, I lost all my hopes that CN Blue would come to fame. I was preoccupied by the thought that me and my brother won't have any brighter future. We did not study, we just killed time playing in the streets gaining no fame at all. I did not left a word to him because I know he won't let me go. But I left a word with our parents.
"Ma, just let me leave. This is for our own good, all for us. All for Jong Hyun." I pleaded my mother who's sitting next to father. I was kneeling before them, wiping away the tears from her eyes.
"Yong hwa, you are too young to be doing this." She held my hand. Yes, my real name's Yong Hwa.
"If I accept that call, Ma, Pa... I will earn money, enough money to sustain the both of you, to sustain Jong Hyun's education and give him a good future."
"How about you? Where will you be? What will you do?" She continued sobbing.
"I will try my best to play guitar and sing better. I will be with another band and be famous. And with that, Ma, Pa... I will earn money."
"Stop thinking about us! Think about yourself.. you are too selfish... you are too selfish!"
I stood up, took my bag of clothes I packed and held back my tears. "I'll be going no matter how you'd stop me. I cannot bring down a bright future for my brother, this is going to be for you too. Ma, don't worry. I'll be back as soon as I can. Pa, please take care of her no matter what happens." I bowed and as I turned my back on them, tears started pouring down on my cheeks.
"Don't go, Yong Hwa! I'd die if you go! I'd die if you go... my child!" That's the last words I heard from my mom who loved me the most back then. I wonder how they're doing now that Jong Hyun's in Seoul now.
Monthly, I give my parents the money to let Jong Hyun study. I took the pain of being away from him, I love him so much because he is my only brother. I took the pain of leaving my parents just because I wanted to be useful to them. I took all the pains away from their burdens to I can carry them all by myself. Because they are my family. But most of all, I wanted to take care of my only brother, Jong Hyun, like a precious stone given to me by the heavens above.
But now, it's all gone.
As I was watching a video of Jong Hyun singing High Fly, I heard a slam of a car door. Suddenly, I realized Sung Hyo isn't home yet and it's already late. I paused what I'm watching.
I peeked at the window, and saw... Jong Hyun? With Sung Hyo? Together? How can Sung Hyo bring him here knowing she's living with us? And we're ANJELL? Not that, besides... he is my brother! And nobody knows that at all.
[Sung Hyo's POV]
"Kamsahamnida. I owe you so much for today..." I bowed.
"Don't be, that's nothing. I ought to help you, Sung Hyo." He grinned and his cute little dimple appeared in his right cheek.
"I'll go inside now, it's a little late. My friend might already be looking for me. Have a safe trip home, good night!" I waved him goodbye. I stepped back as he went inside his car and turned on the head lights and left.
He is my superman today. How can someone so famous like him be so kind? Anyways, I have to hurry and sneak inside.
WOAH! Shin Woo surprised me. How come he's still up?
[Shin Woo's POV]
I must have surprised Sung Hyo.
"Where have you been?" I asked her in a still voice. She is too secretive.
"Why?"
"You cannot answer a question with a question."
"Well--I was in the coffee shop. Why?"
"Who's that with you?"
"A friend? His name's Jong Hyun, he is somewhat famous, I guess?" She answered hesitantly. I know his name, of course.
"Why on earth did you bring him here? What if he knows ANJELL lives here? Huh?"
"I'm sorry..." He looked down.
"Aah! You are too careless, tsk!"
"I'm sorry, but I promise. He doesn't know anything about this house, or about you!" Well I hope she said it right or else we'll be killed by fans because we're living with a girl.
"I mark your word, and I wish it won't cause any trouble."
"I promise. Anyway, where's Mi Nam?"
"He's upstairs, never went down to eat."
"Oh, I'll go upstairs to check on him. Good night!"
She walked past the t.v. then looked at me. Oh shoot. I did not turn off the t.v. did I?
"You sure you don't know him at all?" She pointed to the tv which is on pause.
"HUH? No, not really. I just saw that somewhere, so I tried it! Why do you care so much?"
"Okay. Just, go. Continue watching. Good night!"
That was close to getting busted, Shin Woo! Be careful next time, e?
[Sung Hyo's POV]
I entered our room. I saw Mi Nam curled on her bed, sobbing.
"Mi Nam?" I walked closer to her bed.
"Sung Hyo?" She cried to me once again. She said she can't take it any longer, and it hurts her. It hurts me seeing her hurt like this... Life brings us down most of the time, we just need to fight till the end.
"Dear Diary,
I've been through a lot... I've just written earlier, now I can't help but write again. It's hard to pick up every thread I'm going through. How do you pick those different threads when it feels like I'm living in a world full of lies... Now I'm forced to deceive the people around me. It makes me hard to remember every words I say because I might get caught. It's hard to lie, I wish I can endure that in every lie there is pain.
Whatever Mi Nyu and I are going through, I hope it ends sooner. I want a normal life, and be free from this kind of life.
I've met Jong Hyun of CN Blue tonight with his band mates, Min Hyuk and Jung Shin and I must say they're really kind at heart. Not all famous people are like them who would actually talk to someone like me, a complete stranger. Who knew I've met Jong Hyun before and I'm not aware of it? But I thank God for letting me meet them, they're really awesome people. And Jong Hyun's my super hero... At least tonight, he's that high flying superman who took care of me when I know, we don't know each other that much.
Some people come into our lives and quietly go. Well I hope someone like him stays. I hope he'll be blessed and if we ever meet again, I hope he'll still let me see that smiling face and deep dimples. That whenever I remember his face, he makes me smile now. Thank you, Jong Hyun. Arigatou (now listening to Arigatou of Jong Hyun, he has a perfect voice...), Jong Hyun.
'It's hard to say what's on my mind
But I'd like to hear your voice once more
I want to know you more
Your dazzling eyes shines on me
The time will come permanently
When we will meet each other
One day...'
signed, S.S.H."
"Sung Hyo, thank you so much. For always being there, I owe you who am I and how strong I can be starting today. It's a brand new day, kamsahamnida!" Mi Nam greets me with a tight hug the next morning... I tapped her back saying, 'you deserve all the strength and courage you need'. That's why I love being her best friend.
Arigatou, thank you in Japanese. Kansahamnida in Korean... salamat in Filipino. But they all mean one thing, thank you... and I'm glad to hear and say that to everyone. Today is a brand new day, spend it wisely, Sung Hyo!
Time to look for a job again, AJA!
Episode 2 - Part 3
Saturday, October 9, 2010 @ 8:31 AM
[Sung Hyo's POV]
This day was too random. How can I not know that CN Blue's vocalist and guitarist is Lee Jong Hyun? How can I not know he's the one I've met before? I'm really stupid. I don't know if I should still be alive. I'm too stupid, GAAAAH! I hate myself even more.
"I hope not to see him ever again." As said as I was about to leave the coffee shop, I opened the door but someone from the other side of the door opened it simultaneously. So I was pulling the door, he was pulling it too on the other side. So technically, the door can't be opened. It kinda made me laugh. So I let go of the door's handle and so he opened it.
He was about head taller than me. He was skinny. He has cute eyes. He looks familiar too. But I don't really know him.
He smiled at me, and he's looks so cute as his eyes disappeared because of his smiling eyes. I smiled back at him, he actually reminded me of Jong Hyun, weird. Why does everything and everyone feel so weird to me. I, myself, am weird.
He stood right infront of me, stepped a little at his side... and revealed the 'push' sign behind posted at the door. OKAY. I'm just embarrased once again. We both smiled again. Crap, I didn't really see that 'push' sign that's why I was pulling the door! So on the other side, it was written 'pull'. Maybe I was just bothered by Jong Hyun. Stop thinking about him.
"sorry," I'm really feeling so stupid right now, so much! He just smiled at me, can he even talk? "That's okay," He smiled again as his eyes smiled too.
Okay, as I was about to go out of the coffee shop as I was really about to... Oh, crap. Anybody? Knife. Kill me now. Right this second. Please. No. Oh crap!
Well, this is weird-er. Just as I said I don't want to see Jong Hyun, look who's standing right in front of me. Oh, you can't see him. But I can see him clearly with my two bare eyes. How I wish I'm just dreaming!
I turned around, just a little chance he's not yet seeing me. But right in front of me now's the guy with that cute little eyes, and his eyes looked at me with is-there-something-wrong look. Seriously, what am I gonna do now?
I just sighed. I can't hide anymore. I suddenly want to be invisible.
"Sung Hyo?" Even crap-er. I turned around and forced smiling at Jong Hyun. "It's good to see you tonight." He smiled. Should I say something? I just continued smiling until my cheeks hurt. "It's nice to see you too." "By the way, these are my--""Band mates." I whispered to myself. "Right," Oh, he heard it? I'm really stupid! "This is Jung Shin," The tall and even skinnier than the other shook hands with me. "And that one's Min Hyuk." The other one with smiling eyes smiled again at me and offered his hands. As I took it for shake hands, he looked behind us and his facial reaction turned to a 'oh-crap' look. "Oh, no..." I heard Jong Hyun said from behind. "I'll take care of her," Min Hyuk said still holding my hand. "Yeah, you guys run now. We'll take care of them." I heard Jong Hyun said again. I heard people screaming coming nearer. My eyes widen, they're talking about their fans coming to them!
I wasn't able to react anymore, all I know is that I felt Min Hyuk pulling my hands and we're going nowhere. We're running as if a dog's chasing us. We took the back door of the coffee shop and ran further and faster.
Where nobody's around, where it was a little dark, where I don't know anymore, we stopped. I felt so tired, that was a long run. And I can't get the reason why. Oh, and to tell you... I just threw the coffee I've just bought because we were running and I can't hold it anymore. I just wasted my money. Tsk!
Sigh.
"It's okay now, nobody's around." He said looking around. What is going on? Too tired, I was panting. "Oh, sorry for that. Are you still okay?" Oh, nice question. Can I say 'Oh yes, may I know why we needed to run?' and slap his right cheek right now? My feet hurts. "Just tell me what's that for." I asked and sat on the bench beside the flower box. Inhale, exhale. "Those fans... if they see us with a girl, even if it's you or a celebrity, you'd probably be in ashes the next time we'll see you." "And it means that..." "Those fans could kill you in a split of seconds." I wonder why... "So..." "So it means that fans are die-hard fans, get it?" He said walking to the left, to the right repeatedly in front of me. He's making me dizzy. "Are they really like that?"
"Well, yes. It's not only to our band's fans, all the other fans are that way. Especially the girls." So he's saying that they're too famous and girls are crazy over them? LOL. "You're not believing me." He said standing straight with his hands on his gray jacket's pocket in front of me. He's about five meters away from me. "My sister got traumatized because she was once a fan of A.N.JELL, she's scared of people after those girls sent her too many red cards saying of death threats. Know why? Because she posted her photo with a member of that band as a fan and those other fans started searching for her and saying bad words against her."
"Are they all really like that?" I said in a sorry voice.
"Of course not, not all fans are that way. There are kind fans too. I don't really blame them at all. But now, I can't even see my own sister because she's scared of every one." I suddenly feel so guilty. How can I be so stupid... "Oh... I'm... I'm really sorry."
"That's okay. Wow, I just shared to a stranger something so personal. At least you know now why you should be careful. By the way, how'd you know Jong Hyun?" He asked and sat beside me.
"I don't really know him personally, I've just met him out of the blue."
"Ah, there's so much to know about him. So good thing you don't."
"Huh?"
"Nothing, I said it's good you get along with him well. He's not really that sociable or something." His eyes are always smiling, amazing.
Suddenly, Jong Hyun and Jung Shin came, each holding two coffees. Jung Shin gave the other one to Min Hyuk. Jong Hyun gave the other one to me. I was surprised but I just took it anyway. I'm already freezing too.
[Min Hyuk's POV]
It's pretty odd to be talking to a stranger. I took a sip of the coffee, oh how come it's too hot. It just touched my tongue, I can't take it this hot. Oh, no. How about this girl, the coffee's too hot.
[Jung Shin's POV]
I took a sip of the coffee, ouch! Why is it too hot? I looked at the girl with us, so what if she took a sip too? Oh no.
[Jong Hyun's POV]
Seeing Min Hyuk and Jung Shin sipping coffee, I took a sip too. How come it's this hot? That hurts. I hid my expression that my tongue felt so burnt. Wait, Sung Hyo. What if she drink her coffee too?
[Sung Hyo's POV]
As I was about to sip my coffee, the three of them stopped me and I ended up misholding my coffee. So, OUUUUUCCCCCHHHHHH! The coffee slipped into my hands because I was too shock of them and they pulled my hand holding the coffee too hard on different directions from where they are. This hurts a lot. My right hand felt too hot. The coffee's hot for real! Ouch! My hand!
"Sorry, sorry!" The three of them exclaimed in different timings. "It's okay, it's just... too hot." I said and it makes me wanna cry, haaaaaaa!
I saw the three of them took out each of their handkerchief to the rescue, but Jong Hyun's the first one to wipe the coffee stain on my hand. "Let's get her out of here." Min Hyuk said who's still sitting beside me. Jong Hyun's kind of sitting kneeling just to wipe my hand. "Check her hand if it's okay." Jung Shin said looking at my hand too. "I'm fine, don't worry." I said though I'm really not fine. How can I talk to them this way? We're all completely strangers! "Hospital? Will that work?" Jong Hyun asked them. "No, people might ask who she is." Min Hyuk said. "No choice..." Jung Shin said.
The next thing I know is that I'm at their home. Jung Shin took a medicine kit. I was sitting on the sofa with Jong Hyun still holding still his handkerchief on my hand. Min Hyuk stares at my hand.
"Wash that first with water." Min Hyuk said with crossed arms. I looked at Jong Hyun. "It's okay, I'll do it. I'll wash it by myself." I slightly smiled. He let go of my hand and I stood up holding back my tears, this hand hurts for real. Where's the wash room? Anybody?
"Come on.." Min Hyuk lead the way and I just followed him.
When we reached the bath room, I hesitated to wash my hand. Because as a medtech student, I know this is the right way to cure this. But I know it will be painful at the same time. I turned on the faucet, I can't even look at my hands so I looked away as I slowly extend it to the water.
Suddenly, I felt Min Hyuk's hands in my hand. "Let me help you." I looked at him as he helped me wash my hands. How can they be so kind to someone like me? He slowly caresses my hand, it's still painful, but I know that him washing my hand made it a little less painful.
Jong Hyun put bandage to my hand, and he made sure he won't hurt my hand. I felt like a princess, but I was too uncomfortable as the three of them were surrounding me as Jong Hyun puts the bandage.
"Kamsahamnida. [thank you in Korean, haha. I'm trying to put Korean words here, hehe :)]" I told them bowing. "That's nothing, where do you live? We'll just bring you home, we caused you so much troubles." Min Hyuk said. But where do i live? I live with the A.N.JELL, so I don't think that really a good idea. "No, I'm fine. I'll just go home by myself." "But it's already late..." Min Hyuk insisted. "yeh, Min Hyuk's right." Jung Shin started insisting too. But hey, nobody should know I'm living with the A.N.JELL, still protecting a big secret, okay? Excuses, think Sung Hyo. "If people see me with you, it will just add more issues and troubles. So just let me go home by myself, I'll be fine." "You sure?" Jong Hyun assures. "You've already helped me today, how will it I not be okay now." I smiled. "Okay, but before you go, Jung Shin, Min Hyuk, this is Sung Hyo." Jong Hyun introduced me formally to them. I bowed before them and left.
How can it be so dark and how come there's no bus passing by? Is it that late at night? What have I done... My knees are already shaking.
I walked a little, if no bus will pass by, I'll be stuck. And I don't want to be stuck in the waiting shed anymore, it reminds me of Yeon Hee every time I see one. Maybe I can just walk home. It can't be so far if I started walking home.
I suddenly hear foot steps from behind. I was scared, my heart beats so fast. I started walking fast, but the foot steps sounds even closer. A guy passed by me, and stopped before me. I was so shocked, he's drunk and looked so scary. I turned around to walk the other way, but he held my left arm and pulled me. I pulled back, but he's a guy and strong enough to drag me.
He pushed me to the wall. He looked straight into my eyes and swear, he's really scary. What should I do now... He leaned on me, closer to my face. Oh my gosh, what should I do now.
I just closed my eyes, closed it tightly. I can feel his breath on my face, Oh God... He held my shoulders and I can feel him slightly sniffing or smelling my neck. Oh, my... This is making me cry. Tears started to flow on my cheeks, I was so afraid...
In a split of seconds, I cannot feel him anymore. He's not inches away from me anymore. I cannot feel his hands holding my shoulders, I cannot feel his breath close to me. But I cannot stop crying because I was so afraid, I'm so scared... Mother Superior. Help me.
"It's okay now..." I heard a familiar voice. "It's okay... I'm here now." I felt someone embracing me, those arms held me so tight trying to keep me safe. I still can't stop shedding tears. But his arms around me kept me safe from harm.
It's such a long day, and I've encountered so many things, I've met different people, from the hiring job officers to A.N.JELL members, to CN Blue members... But of all those strangers, who's this angel hugging me now?
Episode 2 - Part 2
Friday, October 8, 2010 @ 6:57 AM
[Sung Hyo's POV]
"Manager Ma, you think I should go down there and apologize to those fans?" Mi Nam asked her manager as we were looking at the mad fans of A.N.JELL against Mi Nam.
"You think so?" Manager Ma threw his jacket and shouted, 'It's Go Mi Nam's!' and the girls down there started tearing the jacket into pieces. "You don't want it to be that way, right?"
"I should stop disguising Mi Nam... this is harder than I thought it should be. I should stop pretending to be Mi Nam." Mi Nam sighed and frowned.
"Disguising and pretending were never synonyms, Mi Nam. They never had the same meanings." I looked straight seeing the tall buildings before my eyes. "When you disguise, it means you're covering up for someone. Not bad at all. But when you pretend, you're making people believe on who you are not. So," I looked at Mi Nam. "Are you pretending or disguising?"
The thing about her and Hwang TaeKyung isn't just a joke. It's something that needs to be seriously fixed before everything gets harder for all the members of A.N.JELL. She is disguising Mi Nam, that's for the good of her brother, even for their dreams to see their mother, so I don't think there's anything wrong when you just need to cover up for someone who might actually be really in need more than how you're blood-related.
Pretending, for me, is acting as if everything's happening the best way things can be. Pretending is accepting the fact that hurts you the most. Pretending is feeling against your own feelings. Pretending is fighting what you really feel because you thought that that's what's best. Again, you just thought of it. Not thoroughly considering other possibilities. Pretending is being who you're not because you're protecting something or someone you think is more essential than your own good.
"I'll be seeing you later, Mi Nam. I'll continue looking for a job, okay? You can do it, AJA!" I cheered her up before I left.
"What do you mean job?" Her manager asked in out of the blue.
I was shocked with his question. "Huh?"
Mi Nam interrupted. "He meant it as... uh, take care. Yah, take care on your way." She hand signaled an 'okay' sign. "Manager Ma, Sung Hyo's not used to talking about her personal life. Just let her go." I heard her whisper to Manager Ma which really made me grin a big one.
"Yeh, I meant it as 'take care' and good luck!" Manager Ma said AJA. Well, that's my favorite line anyway.
I waved good bye and headed to find a job again.
As the sun sets, I didn't find any job at all. Am I really ready to work? Nothing but writing is my passion.
I stopped by the porch when I reached the A.N.JELL's house. I don't know why but I really don't feel so welcome here... Maybe I should really get a job as soon as possible, as soon as tomorrow.
I took my camera and took some shots of the sun setting. It will be dark again later and that's what I hate about every day of my life. Life without the sky is a misery. As I was focusing on the sun shining as it sets, somebody blocked the light the sun shines. I zoomed it out a little to be sure I wasn't dreaming, the blurry focused and was clear now. I was shocked by who it was that's why I accidentally hit the shutter. My jaw dropped when I figured it all out I'm not dreaming.
"My picture costs a hundred thousand won." Kang Shin Woo mocked me.
"I'm sorry, I was just surprised? Yeh, I was surprised to see you." I looked down, trying to avoid his angelically created eyes.
He walked closer to me. My heart acted so weird, I felt my heartbeat. That is totally weird. Who feel their heart beating without even touching your chest to feel it? Kindly raise your hand! I'd be raising both of my hands!
"It's really weird too," he started out looking straight into my eyes. I gulped. "because I'm really, really sure I've seen you before, even before our van accidentally hit you..." He was kind of inspecting my posture, height and eyes.
"What are you looking at?"
"I'm just thinking when and where and how..." Okaaaay. I don't know what he's talking about.
"I... I need to go inside, and finish my work." I grabbed my laptop, honestly, I was supposed to work with my laptop here at the porch.
"What work?" Why is he asking too many questions?
"Well, I... I don't have work... yet. What I meant was... I'm working with the pictures I've taken today. I'll just see you around." I rushed into the house like a kid trying to runaway from her playmate.
Now I was weird.
As I was uploading pictures... I stared in his picture I mistakenly took. He's so adorable... Is there any word greater than adorable? I could use it right now to describe him... Wake up, Sung Hyo! No, yes you can't like him! I meant, NO I CAN'T LIKE SOMEONE LIKE HIM! I was just surprised to see him before my camera. Yeah, that's just it.
Breathe in... Take it out... Inhale... Exhale.
What's that? I heard someone dragging... Is that Mi Nam? Oh, no. What's happening?
I rushed out of the room I'm sharing with Mi Nam, and left my laptop open. When I reached the living room, Jeremy, Shin Woo, Manager Ma, and another guy... Maybe their manager, as in A.N.JELL's manager or something?
"TaeKyung, what are you doing?" The man asked.
"Get him out of this house." TaeKyung pointed Mi Nam who's standing beside him.
"Yah, hwang Tae Kyung, do you really want to add fuel to the fire?"
"Then I will go." He puts down his right arm.
"Ah, hyung, why do you have to move?" Jeremy asked who's standing beside Shin Woo near the sofa.
"Hwang Tae Kyung. Don't behave that way." The man said, and Tae Kyung walked out.
"Those two didn't get along well in the first place." Shin Woo said... I admire calmness in his voice. "When there are lots of misunderstandings, let's give them both some more time."
Mi Nam went outside, maybe she's trying to follow or stop Tae Kyung from leaving. I hate this part, we'll get busted or should we leave now?
"Those kids, they truly can't control themselves." Manager Ma said with crossed arms.
My knees were shaking, surely Mi Nam will be hurt. I know her from body and soul, she's too kind to be down like this.
Manager Ma went out, I wanted to follow but my feet felt so fixed and glued to the ground.
"You okay?" Jeremy asked me. I blinked my eyes a little more, looked at him and smiled.
"Yah, I'm fine." I finally had the courage to follow Manager Ma.
As they were talking, I knelt before them.
"Su..Sung Hyo?" Mi Nam was surprised.
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry you'd have to undergo this things." I said. And truly am.
"You don't need to be like this, besides, I'm gonna be fine, right, Manager Ma?" She said with a lively voice.
"But this is too hard for you, I know how you feel just right now." I looked up to them.
"Sung Hyo, when you differentiated disguising and pretending, it would be just hurt coming all the way if I'm pretending. So, Sung Hyo... Thank you for you've enlighten my eyes, I'm disguising. Not pretending."
"Plus, I'm sorry I have to be added to your problems. I found so many jobs, but I chose none at all..." I looked down.
"Why? You don't like them all?"
"I'll try to find something that fits me better. I will try my best so I won't add up to your problems. Besides, if I have a job, I can finally leave and stop doing this. It won't take too long, I promise."
"Oh, yah. You like writing, you graduated medtech... How on earth can you find a job... Don't worry, you'll soon find one. And you can stay with me as long as you need."
"Thank you, Mi Nam. Anyway, I'm practicing so hard to call you that way." I kind of whispered. Mi Nam stood up and embrace me. "Just tell me if you need some help, okay?" I whispered in her ears. "We're sisters, right?"
I went back to our room and found my laptop still open with Shin Woo's accidentally taken photo. I rushed to close the window, somebody might see it! AH! I'm so stupid.
I put my earpones on and listened to Love Light of CN Blue. YouTube can be so useful most of the time.
[please disregard Yong Hwa (Shin Woo) on the video, please? haha. It will be as if he's not there, only the three members.
I took my pen and sat down, I took my diary and started writing.
"Dear Diary,
A lot happened today. I finally understood even more what's disguising and pretending. Mi Nyu's disguising Mi Nam. And I am pretending to be his sister. I thought they were only words, just words. But when Mi Nam said that she's just disguising and not pretending, it struck me that my words can actually struck someone like her, my best friend.
I'm trying to find a job so I can live on my own and stop being dependent on Mi Nyu (let me call her that way as long as I'm referring to her as Mi Nyu, not as Mi Nam). I have found so many jobs, but I'm such a loser I don't want them all. All I want to do is write, that's all I needed, that's all I wanted. Photography is just a side-effect of loving the sky, hehe. So I was expressing my feelings in the photos I take, and I write down how the picture mean to me. That when you look at it, there's nothing really special. But it actually speaks about my heart always.
I write down how I feel because I'm not an expressive person. I'd prefer being alone most of the time, because I'm scared on how people might think of me. It feels like I don't need anyone write now, just this pen and you, my diary.
It's been days since I've last seen my parents. No matter how they hate me, I still hope they're doing just fine. And maybe someday, when we see each other again, they'll come to me in open arms.
Being stuck in a house with all boys, that's all weird. Well, that's how they think, maybe. Because I am actually with Mi Nam, a girl in everything she is. Her heart and soul, she's a girl. Though she's dressed and acts as a boy, that don't change anything in my eyes at all. I was so stupid earlier, I acted weird, haha. I'm just afraid I might say something that could reveal our little secret. So you better don't tell anyone too, okay?
I've written so much today... Love light of CN Blue's really heart warming... Time to end this entry.
"I've traveled so far
I have to keep the promise
Secrets are hidden
But the truth lies behind.
Things will get better
I've slept in my shadows
But a brand new day
Will heal all wounds..."
signed, S.S.H."
I closed my diary and put it down... I think I want some coffee, I'm just gonna buy and go out in a bit.
As I was about to close the window of YouTube, wait... Why am I really stupid? AM I JUST SLEEPY, TIRED OR REALLY MADLY CRAZY?
CN Blue's vocalist... Oh, no... Come on. Is he the same person as I've met when I fainted? Is he the same person I've bumped into when I was in the A.N.JELL's company? Lee Jong Hyun? It's really crazy now that I don't know how to feel.
I put down the laptop, what I've seen can't be true. Oh, if not for YouTube... I wouldn't have known it at all!
Coffee. I need some coffee.
[Shin Woo's POV]
I've watched Sung Hyo writing down something in a notebook with her earphones plugged in her laptop as a video was playing. She looked adorable somehow. I was peeking as her door was slightly open.
I hid behind the wall when she went out of her room. Oh, I am so not me with what I am gonna do.
I sneaked inside her room shared with Mi Nam. There, nothing's so special. I saw the notebook she was writing into on her table.
"Read a word, and I'll kill you." That's written in the first page. She's really weird and funny at the same time. Girl things boys can't understand.
She's really into writing? Dear Diary... blah blah blah... I scanned the pages, not too interesting. Too many pages, she's just wasting papers. I got into the last page where she'd written earlier.
I'm here because I'm suspecting she's hiding something as much as Mi Nam's hiding something I already know... How can someone leave her diary lying where any one can just take it?
"A lot happened today. I finally understood even more what's disguising and pretending. Mi Nyu's disguising Mi Nam. And I am pretending to be his sister. I thought they were only words, just words. But when Mi Nam said that she's just disguising and not pretending, it struck me that my words can actually struck someone like her, my best friend."
I guess I'm just right. How... on earth... This is driving me insane.
Episode 2 - Part 1
Monday, October 4, 2010 @ 3:41 AM
[Sung Hyo's POV]
Oh my gosh... what to do now... Mi Ny--Mi Nam's sleeping in between the three guys. What happened last night was actually... Aaah! I don't want to remember it. It's gross and I can't even imagine it happened.
I'm peeking at the A.N.JELL sleeping in the living room together. Mi Nam, wake up now... I really don't know what to do... I saw it all before my eyes. And there's really more to throwing up in Hwang Tae-kyung's... This is disgusting. But... what I saw while stared at you falling off the bench and who took care of you was actually... No. Kang Shin-woo doesn't know anything and you'll never get busted with our little secret. But the way he looked at you was so strange. I should stop dreaming too anyway.
Before I even wake Mi Nam by myself, she ran all the way out.
Could she have figured it all out?
I leaned on the wall thinking these all through. *Sigh* When I peeped again, Jeremy wasn't there anymore! Where could he go.... Will he scold at Mi Nam? Wow, I'm getting used to calling Mi Nyu as Mi Nam. Or will he feel sorry for Mi Nam about last night? Wow, I'm really getting used to it.
I leaned back against the wall again. This is disappointing... I lasted a day pretending to be Mi Nam's sister. Shin-woo even mentioned we do not resemble in looks. Because I think I'm totally different from Mi Nyu, both in the way of thinking and mannerisms. Oh, crap. I just called her Mi Nyu. MI NAM. Stamp it hard in your head, Sung Hyo.
I sighed. This is gonna take a while. I looked down, and I suddenly remembered on thing. I lost my bag the night when I was at a bar that's why Dad got me busted.
I suddenly saw Kang Shin-woo standing right in front of me. I was stunned that he actually still looks good even in the morning. This is when someone should greet me 'good morning'. My eyes grew bigger, I know. I'm in a state of shock because I was having a deep sigh or what I call sentimental-moments-with-your-thoughts-and-you.
"Kang Shin-woo?" I gulped.
"Is there something you'd want to tell me?" He asked me and I was like, 'I'd like to tell you you're so handsome...' and freak out and run! Haha. Lol, I won't.
"Huh? Is there something I should tell you?" I ask like a puppy being so shy. I can't even look straight into his eyes so I just looked away.
"Because you look so familiar to me... I wonder where I've seen you before..." He brushed his chin thinking.
"Are you... talking about when I was accidentally bumped by A.N.JELL's van? That's when we've first met." I explained.
"Aah, that's when I had to carry you..."
"I told you to put me down that time." I argued.
"Aah, yeah. I remember now. And you were too heavy."
"Huh? No I'm not!"
"Weh? I think I'm even lighter than you are."
"HUH???" I looked down at my body like a child. I am not even an inch fat. Just kidding, but swear I am skinny.
"Just kidding." He laughed as if he never laughed before. Oh, how adorable. ^_^
"You're so mean.." I joked.
"You looked cute anyway, looking down at your body... Hahaha!"
"HMP! I'll just look for my sister." I turned around to start looking for Mi Nyu. Oh CRAP.
"Huh?" He was like... putting a big question mark before my eyes. CRAP. CRAP. CRAP!
I looked at him. "Just kidding." I smiled like a puppy again. Like how a chow chow would do when his master caress his hair. I continued walking away. Howley Mowley.
How can I put into my head that Mi Nam's my sister... Mi Nam's my sister... Mi Nam's my sister now I exclaimed MI NAM'S MY SISTER. Oh, geez. MI NAM'S MY BROTHER, NOT SISTER. Lock it in your head, Sung Hyo. Disregard her or... his gender this time.
"Mi Nam?" I asked when Mi Nam entered the house, she was in the balcony, or porch, or I don't know where she had been.
"Sung Hyo," she sighed. "I still need to apologize, I'll talk to you later." She said in a pleading voice. She must be talking about Tae-Kyung. Poor Mi Nyu... Tsk.
"Wait," I called her. "I'll be out today, maybe I can look for jobs so I can get enough money to sustain my own living. So that one day, I'll have my own room, okay?"
"Huh? You don't need to do that, Sung Hyo..."
"It's okay, just to repay you, Mi Nam."
She did not speak anymore, I went outside and took my Canon EOS 500D which I got as graduation gift from my parents... Now I remembered again my parents.
I stayed at the porch for awhile sitting on a chair there stared holding my DSLR. Confusing how I should live my life alone some day...
I stood up and took shots of the sky. All flashbacks came up in my head... Yeon Hee, Mom, Dad... Everyone that brings tears in my eyes. When I stopped taking photos of the sky. I wiped the tears in my eyes.
"Wow." Someone said from behind. It was Jeremy.
"Jeremy?"
"Just taking pictures make you cry?" He asked while holding his orange fruit.
"Not really," I finally smiled. "I'll go now." I walked past him.
I went to different shops, but they said my degree doesn't fit those kinds of job. Because I graduated medtech, now I'm applying in each store I can see. Funny it's easier to accept rejection when I know I didn't even want those jobs in the first place.
I stopped by a coffee shop and took my laptop. Well yes, as a student, I had a laptop. Because remember my parents are too willing for me to be a doctor, so they gave me everything I needed when I was in college.
I transferred the photos from my camera. I uploaded it on my tumblr and put the best descriptions I can write that interprets best the picture. As a writer I know from myself, I always do this.
It's even funny that I have these 999 followers. Haha, my soulmate would be my 1000th follower.
"What's pain? It's when you see everything's okay. But you don't feel the same. When in every breath you take, your hope is going to fade. That when you try to hold on longer, it keeps on getting harder. Break down, get up. Cry your heart out, but be sure to wipe your tears away.
Sure it may be painful right now, and it feels like what you had before will always be in your heart no matter what. It's hard to forgive, but it's harder to forget. Don't wait till the time comes that you can't even forgive yourself anymore.
Look at the sky... sure it seems grayish at times, but the sun's just maybe tired of shining too. That sometimes, you'll need to search for the light within.
Be good today, folks!
signed with ♥, S.S.H."
Publish.
[Jong Hyun's POV]
WOW. Such a good writer. I clicked 'follow' the time I finished reading her recent post. There are really those unnoticeable people who are actually capable of touching each of her reader's heart. I swear this S.S.H. is really a good writer. Now I ended up reading her recent posts.
These photos she took are all great. There are really talented people, but I swear she's one of a kind.
Suddenly, Min Hyuk came and tapped me from behind.
"C'mon, we need to practice for our show tonight." Then he grabbed his drum sticks on the table. And he glanced on what I'm reading, "What now? Enjoying the net?" He smiled again and his eyes disappeared and funny how his eyes smile too.
"okay, okay. Let's go." I shut my laptop down and followed Min Hyuk.
Min Hyuk (left) and Jong Hyun (right).
[Sung Hyo's POV]
Ooh? 1000 followers? Who could my 1000th follower be?
Episode 1 - Part 4 (last part)
Saturday, October 2, 2010 @ 11:01 PM
[I do not own any video/pictures here and in the recent posts and in the future posts. I'm giving full credits to the uploaders, much ♥]
[Sung Hyo's POV]
"You sure you're gonna be fine? Mi Nyu, you don't have to do this, you know that, right?" I asked her... she's dressed as a boy disguising her twin, Mi Nam. Not that I don't want her to do it, I just don't know where to live without her by my side. Besides, what is there for her when she pursue pretending to be a guy? What is there for her when she has to let go being a girl? Being who she really is... I envy this kind of sister... She's too kind to handle this all.
"Sung Hyo... if I'm not going to do this, I'm breaking my brother's dream. Besides, I'm already here. They're calling me now outside."
"But--"
"Sure it hurts now, but I know that someday, I'll be okay. Trust me, e? I need you to trust me, if not for you today, I wouldn't have a best friend." She's pulling back her tears and trying her best to smile. That's even sad.
"I don't know what to say, Mi Nyu. So, from now on... You'll be Mi Nam."
"Yeh, and you call me Mi Nam, okay?"
I nodded. "Do good, Mi Nam." I embraced her.
After more seconds, I loosen up and let go of her. She walked closely to the door and stood there for more seconds. She took a step forward, and the doors opened automatically. There were flashes of light from the media. There was the blinding spotlight shining over her... She's Mi Nam now, and I have to support her in her choice.
I turned around and shed a tear... I walked out of the room... I hope she'll be fine. I know how hard it is for her to be there standing right in front of the world without knowing consequences. I sighed, and wiped my tears away.
As soon as I was outside, I'm blank and empty handed. Where should I go now?
I went somewhere I can see the sky clearly... I hope it won't rain so the sky would be blue. I went up a little hill... It's so peaceful here. I feel so alone, but it's uplifting my spirit that the world's too wide for me to be sad. I'll find a way to get over this pains...
"Dear Diary,
I lost Mi Nyu today... sure it hurts so bad to lose a best friend. Now she turned out to be Mi Nam, and I'd have to support her all the way. We're best friends forever... But she'll be very busy in her own way. Where should I go now? I have no idea what to do now... The pain in my heart.... I don't think it will ever go away. It's not about Mi Nyu... because my life's starting to be a complete mess right now. It's about me... and it hurts that's it only about me. My life's only about me. Only me. :(
Where should I go now?
They sky's so blue today... at least my favorite scenery is before my eyes. It's too wide, horizon's too wide. Where will I find my way? God... let me know where I will be.
"Can't anybody feel my heart?
It wasn't this way from the start.
It's hard so say what's inside
I'm bothered by what's on my mind.
I'm still searching for the light...
But I'm still stuck in the dark.
I was searching for my shadows.
But I'm still in the dark."
Signed, S.S.H."
I returned to the convent and packed my bags. I can't stay here without Mi Nyu. It's a relief that Mother Superior's always been there for me.
"Sung Hyo, my child." She said as I was saying goodbye.
"Mother Superior..."
"You can stay here if you want, but there will always be a choice better than this." She said caressing my left cheek.
"Choice? I know you're always right, Mother Superior. But I guess I'd have to make my own choices starting tonight. I'll go now, thank you. Thank you, Mother Superior."
"And it has come..." Honestly, her words are sometimes giving me goosebumps. But I was never scared because I trust her so much as much as Mi Nyu trusts her. She's really one of a kind...
"Sung Hyo!" I heard someone shouting my name from afar. I turned around to see who it was. You're never gonna believe this. She ran to me jumping up and down.
"What are you... doing... here?" I asked her.
"Sung Hyo, I can't just leave you that way. Mother Superior, I'm going to take Sung Hyo with me. Thank you for taking care of her. Thank you, Mother Superior." Mi Nyu started bowing before Mother Superior.
"Mi Ny--Mi Nam." I hesitated to go.
"It's okay, Sung Hyo." She said and called Manager Ma who came with her. Manager Ma took my bags and put it on the car. "Come on, Sung Hyo. We'll be together again even if I'm Mi Nam now. Nothing changes, okay?"
I was too surprised I just nodded. Mi Nyu... or should I call her Mi Nam? Mi Nam went to the car first. I turned to Mother Superior.
"Mother Superior..." I felt like crying. She is amazing... I swear to God, she is my miracle today.
"Sung Hyo, my child. Go now, a choice just came right in front of you." She embraced me and I waved goodbye.
"Sung Hyo, I'm sorry for just dragging you." Mi Ny--Mi Nam said as I was sitting at the back.
"huh? What are you saying? I should be thankful for being dragged by you." I mocked her jokingly.
"Sung Hyo... Being dragged right now, can you do me a favor?"
I'm scared of favors... "Sure."
Mi Nam told me what happened before they fetched me.
"Why are you crying?" Shin Woo said.
"I'm not crying... I'm just going to miss someone."
"Who? Your girlfriend." Jeremy asked from behind.
"No... My sister."
"You have a sister?" Shin Woo asked again.
"Well... Apparently, yes I have."
"Where is she now?"
"I don't know where she'd be without me..."
"Why not bring her here with us?"
"What? No, no.."
"Because she's a girl? Don't worry, you're her brother, right? Maybe she can stay with you in your room for the mean time."
"Do you think that's a good idea?"
"Yes, we'd love to meet her anyway." Jeremy joked.
"Now, that's bad." Mi Nam said thinking it through.
"Seriously, she can stay here and maybe move after she finds a place to stay. Is that okay, Jeremy?"
"Yes!"
"Taekyung?"
"No."
"Shin Woo?" He asked himself. "Yes! Mi Nam?"
"Huh? Uh... yes!"
"So, 'yes' wins! Go, get your sister. Okay?" Shin woo said and stood up from the sofa.
"So now... you need me to pretend.. as your sister?" I asked in curiosity.
"Sorry, Sung Hyo... do you think it's a bad idea?"
"No... no, of course not! Act like your sister... that'd be good. That's easy... besides, being best friends is like being sisters." I high-fived with Mi Ny--Mi Nam. Whew! I have to get used to calling her Mi Nam.
Whoa... I'm in the A.N.JELL's house. That's amaziiiing.
"This is my sister, Sung Hyo." Mi Nam introduced me to them. Oops... wrong house or what? Oh, crap! I remembered now when I was... accidentally bumped by A.N.JELL's car and I was brought by one of them and I saw the three of them. Exactly... they are exactly whom I met before. Crap.
"Oh, her? Such a small world." Someone with a blond hair color said smiling.
"Oh, you've met before?"
"Yes, on the road. We didn't know she's your sister... There's no resemblance. But anyway, welcome to A.N.JELL's residence." The other one with a loose sweater said smiling too.
"Oh, great! Sung Hyo, this is Jeremy," Mi Nam pointed the one with the blonde hair. "And this is Kang Shin Woo." He waved at me like saying hello. What an angelic face he has... "And Hwang Tae-kyung." The tallest of the three and... scariest-looking from the three.
"Nice to meet you." I bowed.
We went to the welcome party of Mi Nam. Odd-looking people were around me, and I'm trying to pretend to be Mi Nam's sister as Mi Nyu's trying to pretend as Mi Nam. What a crazy world we have entered.
"Mi Nam, are you okay?" She looked drunk. Oh, God.
"Yeah... Yeah..." She said and went to the comfort room. Well I hope she's really fine. What if she went to the female's room? Oh no. I have to help her. Wait. I can't enter men's rest room. Oh, no. What to do...
I searched for Mi Nam, but I can't seem to see her anywhere. I don't want her to cause any trouble right now... She can't be busted.
I went to the terrace, and there I saw Mi Nam standing in the chair in the terrace with the three other guys of A.N.JELL. It's a relief...
Episode 1 - Part 3
@ 4:24 AM
[Sung Hyo's POV]
"I haven't seen you longer an hour these days, Sung Hyo. What are you busy at?", Mi Nyu asked me as I was up early six in the morning fixing myself.
"I'm looking for my parents, Mi Nyu." I sighed. "It's been days and I can't see them. I can't contact them so I'm just looking for them. Don't worry, I won't give up before they leave. I'll be looking for them and stop them for leaving, okay?" I said with a lively tone.
"Okay, I trust you. Go Sung Hyo! AJA!"
"Fighting!" Then she embraced me. "I'll be going now, bye! See you later!"
"Yes, don't forget I'll be leaving tomorrow for Rome!"
"I'll be home on time!" I shouted from afar.
I searched everywhere... As in every place I can think of. I even forgot to eat my lunch. It's crazy to be looking for someone you don't have any idea where they'd go. It can't be this way, I can't just lose my parents this way. I can beg for their forgiveness, right? I can do everything to make it up for them. Mom, where are you now with dad?
I travelled too much, I'm pretty tired now. It's already seven in the evening, I remembered I told Mi Nyu I'll be home in time... I couldn't be late this time. Know what scares me? It's when tomorrow comes and I can't see them anymore.
I took the way home... Maybe before they leave I can see them at home... I miss them both. It hurts so bad that I'm still hoping that they'd accept me as their daughter, as for who I am and what I am. And stop comparing me to Yeon Hee.
I rang the door bell. "Mom? Dad?" And I tapped the gate. I pressed again the door bell. No answer. I sighed, and shouted again, "Mom? Dad? It's Sung Hyo. MOM? DAD?" Still nothing. I'm almost crying. "MOM? DAD? It's me." I was really shouting... It's drizzling.
"Sung Hyo?" Jin Rin came to me with an umbrella. "What are you doing here? It's almost raining." "I'm calling Mom and Dad. But they weren't answering my calls. I had to look for them, but I guess they're not at home." I said as she put the umbrella on me too. "Oh, that... I'm sorry, Sung Hyo."
"Sorry for what? You haven't done any thing wrong." I was too curious. "I was wrong... The day when you called, they already left to Busan. I'm sorry, Sung Hyo."
"That's... that's okay."
"I'm sorry, Sung Hyo. I didn't know it, they said they changed their flight earlier. I'm sorry again."
"What you did was fine, totally fine. I'm just not okay. You know what? I've been looking for them the whole week, now it turned out I was looking for no one. Crazy but I even skipped meals." I said faking a smile but tears ran down my face.
"I'm sorry." "It's okay, Jin Rin. At least, at least I've tried." The rain poured down heavily. I'm not mad at Jin Rin, it just hurts to receive the worst news ever. So they really left... Now that hurts.
I ran in the rain... I don't even have any idea where I'm going. The rain felt so cold, my stomach's acting up... I remembered I haven't eaten anything the whole day since I woke up this morning. I was travelling looking for my parents who just left Seoul. I'm all wet now, how do you expect me to be okay?
Suddenly, the things around me started to be blurry. Could it be all because of the rain? Well, I hope so. But I can't even feel my own feet. I can't even see anything... anymore...
[Jong Hyun's POV]
Driving fast on my way home, damn it was raining so hard. Know what I'm afraid of? It's being alone, and I'm alone on the road driving by myself. I just got a brand new car, so naturally, I got to drive on my own. Min Hyuk and Jung Shin's still on the car shop... They were too slow picking cars they wanted. I just need to reach home, maybe our gardener or cook or whoever's there. My heartbeat's really fast, I don't want to be alone like this. Do you know autophobia? It's fear of being alone. Too bad I have that. Good thing it's not agoraphobia.
How can a new car get wet? Stupid rain.
Wait... that girl looks very familiar. She's... I don't really know her name, but I met her last time... She's running in the rain. What's she up to this time? Wait... Is she okay? Cause she looks so pale. Oh, God... no.
I caught her before she even totally broke down to the ground.
"Hey... Hey." I shook her. But she did not respond. Now I'm all wet too. But that doesn't matter, she's sick, maybe. I brought her to my car, now my car's wet too. Again, it doesn't matter... I pity this girl... It feels like she's going through a lot of things.
I have to get her to the nearest hospital anyway.
How come the nearest hospital's this far? Sigh.
She seriously looks so sick right now. She moved a bit, good thing she's conscious.
"Hey... Don't move too much, I'll get you to the hospital." I told her and she slowly opened her eyes.
"Whe.. where am I?" She asked slowly moving her head looking around.
"I saw you broke down on the road while you were running, I was able to catch you as you painted." I explained.
"Who are you?" She asked me but not in a high-toned voice.
"We met last time on.. uh, the A.N.JELL's company, I guess?" She looked thinking hard.
"Yah, I remember you..." She answered coldly.
"We're getting there now, don't worry."
"Wait, stop the car." "What?" "I'm okay now, I don't need to go to the hospital. Please, let me go down now." She said slightly tearty-eyed.
"You sure you're okay?" She opened the door by herself and went down. She slightly slipped, good thing I was able to catch her back.
"Stop acting like you know me, okay? Just leave." She shoved away my hands.
"Can I just drive you home?" I asked.
"Stop it, let me go." She said and took a step but she tripped again.
"Look, if you don't want my help, just call your parents. Let them pick you up, they might be worrying about you now." I sat her down to the stairs near us.
"You're asking me if I'm okay, how do you want me to act, like I know you? Please just go, I can't act like I do know you. Leave me alone." She said coldly.
"Is anything's wrong?"
"My parents threw me out of the house, now you want me to go home?"
"I'm sorry, I... I didn't know."
"My parents don't answer my calls, and you're telling me to call them."
"I--I'm sorry, I didn't know it either."
"That's it. We're completely strangers, so you can't just ask me if I'm okay." She started sobbing.
I leaned on my car. "Look, you said it yourself that we're completely strangers. Could you tell me what happened because we're just strangers, right?"
She continued sobbing. I don't think she'll even tell me a word.
"My sister died years ago." She started, it's even funnier that I'm paying attention to someone like her. A Jong Hyun's talking to a stranger, wow. Good job, Jong Hyun. "She's my twin, and she died because of me. My parents were so down like they forgot I lost my sister too.
"It was because of me why she's gone now." She looked down and cry harder. I offered my handkerchief and glad she took it. "I had to get my report card, but it was raining so hard I was stuck in the bus station. She did a favor to me and took my report card disguising as me since we're identical twins. She was so happy about my grades and wanted to celebrate. She said she'll fetch me, but she never came.
"Just because of one favor, she died. Because of that, I learned I was a big mistake in this world. I tried living in her path. I gave up my dreams and lived hers. But I fail trying to be like her. I failed a subject once, and my parents compared me to her. I was so used to comparison between me and Yeon Hee, but it hurts more that time because they wished I died in place of Yeon Hee." She sobbed again. But she wiped her tears away this time and looked straight.
"I failed them again, and they threw me out of the house. I tried to call them, but they never answered my calls. I looked for them, I searched the whole Seoul for them. But I never saw them. Today, I spent the whole day looking for them, I even skipped meals, I didn't eat the whole day. Maybe that's why I fainted. I found out that they already left Seoul days ago, so I was looking for no one. I just... I just can't believe they left me alone like this... Like they forgot I'm their daughter."
She cried even more. I can't help but pity her and feel sorry for her. I can't stand a girl hurting this bad.
I sat beside her and caressed her back. I tapped her back and comforted her. She leaned on my shoulder. "Shh. Stop crying, you'll be okay..." I kind of whispered.
"I just don't get it why... why it has to be me. Now I wish I should really have died, not Yeon Hee."
"Stop saying that... Everything's gonna be alright."
I remembered my brother... He doesn't have an idea what happened to our family back in town. I had just stopped being his brother anyway... why do I need to care about him since he was the one who left me?
"Sung Hyo?" Someone came in an outift of a nun.
I loosen up my arm around her shoulder. She wiped her tears right away. "Mi Nyu? I'm glad to see you." She forced herself to smile, I can see that.
"Who is he?"
She looked at me. "Oh, I'm Jong Hyun. Lee Jong Hyun." I introduced myself.
"He... he was the once who helped me. Anyway, why are you here?" "Everyone's worried about you in the convent. Please, let's go home now. Mother Superior wants to see you."
"Oh, okay." She said, I helped her stood up. "Thank you so much, Jong Hyun. Thank you for helping me. I appreciate it, and sorry for causing you troubles again. I'll have to go now, I'm Sung Hyo."
"It's nothing. Just make sure you'll be okay."
"I will. Thank you so much!" She said and left with the nun. She managed to smile a bit anyway, that's a relief. Suddenly, Min Hyuk and Jung Shin came with their brand new cars.
"What are you doing here?" Min Hyuk asked. "Nothing, I just helped someone. Why are you so late?"
"Jong Hyun looks a little happy... Happier than he seems to be." Jung Shin mocked me.
"Happy? Why? Should I be happy you're so slow picking cars?"
"It was hard, you know..." Min Hyuk said looking at his yellow sports car.
"It was harder driving alone on the road, that's hard for me, okay?"
"Oh, sorry. Autophobia's attacking you?"
"Glad it didn't." Well, because I was with someone earlier, I was with Sung Hyo earlier.
We drove home with our new cars. Sung Hyo, such a pretty name.
[Mi Nyu's POV]
How come I left my plane ticket to Rome with that guy? How can it be the same guy as the A.N.JELL's leader?!!!
How can I go to Rome to study? This is disappointing.
Is this his cellphone? This could be his song too. Can I listen to it? He's blessed with a very warm voice...
I remembered what Manager Ma said when I came here in the airport. Mi Nam wanted to pursue singing because he wanted to be famous. And when he's finally famous, he'll be looking for our mother. When we were young, we were teased for being beggars because we didn't have parents. Mi Nam never gave up looking for our mother. If I disguised as Mi Nam, will I be able to see our mother?
Mother Superior, what should I do now?
[Sung Hyo's POV]
Watching every plane fly... is like watching my parents leave me here. I still tried to catch them by the airport, but I haven't seen any signs of them. They sure have left... maybe I should just accept that fact.
I'm worthless now, it's clear that I don't have any profession.
'Dear Diary,
I'm listening to Teardrops in the Rain of CN Blue, and it's making my heart cry even more. What should I do now? I'm a worthless person again. Everyone had left me for their own good. What should I go when I don't even know when to be right in other people's eyes? It even feels like nobody can see me, no one can see my pain like teardrops in the rain...
I'm everything I'm cracked up to be. Nobody's perfect, but I'm way too imperfect. When will somebody care about me? When will someone not want to see me blue? I don't have anyone or anything right now... Why did God choose me to live instead of someone who can be useful as a living person?
